Grandpa Bitter, passed away earlier today

I took this photo of Grandpa Bitter back in February. Little did I know it would be the last time I saw him.



It's my favorite.

I remember him always, sitting there, chin resting on hands, listening, thinking, or just enjoying the view.

I remember his hands.



They've always looked similar to this. Strong fingers, bent with age. I specifically made a point to take a picture, so I'd always remember.

They're so much like my father's hands, and a bit like mine.

He passed away earlier this evening.

He lived a full and happy life. Enjoyed 64 years of marriage, and lived to be 91.



Love you Grandpa!
-M

Annee, was thinking about you this afternoon

Annee,

I was thinking about you this afternoon.

Love you.

Miss you.

-M (also known as Bitter)

Annee, things i remember about her

As some of you may know, my little sister Anneliese Bitter Wood (known as Annee, pronounced Ah-knee) passed away two years ago today from liver cancer. As November 8th approached, I've wondered what to do.

You see I don't want to forget her, nor do I want to let the day pass by without thinking of her, speaking of her, or remembering her. But how to do so? What's appropriate? And so for months I've pondered what to do, and finally two days ago I realized what I want this day to be, a day of remembrance, of celebration, of making note of what she did and who she is. A positive remembrance of her life, from those of us who love her.

So without further ado, I'll commence.

I remember Annee loved bananas. As a little girl, she downed them like they were water and she was a sponge. She was strong and stocky, and had biceps of steel. We used to hang her from the fireplace mantel to entertain ourselves and unsuspecting guests and friends.

She would dress up as wonder woman all the time, and wore the Halloween costume year round until she couldn't fit in it anymore.

I'll post a photo here of her and her wonder woman costume later tonight.

She wanted to be a percussionist in high school, but in 7th grade she had to start on a wind instrument first, so she played the trombone like Grandma Bitter. The next year she transferred over to the drums and played until she was in high school. She loved the drum core and had a blast.

She played soccer and was good at it. As a freshman in high school she made the varsity team and played for a few years. In the off seasons, she played tennis and softball. Needless to say, in high school, quads of steel joined her biceps, and her stocky frame became slim.

She took photography in high school and was on the year book staff. She fell in love with the art of taking photos and was the official family photographer.

She took German instead of French like me...I'm still not quite sure what to think of this. I must not have brain-washed her as successfully as I did Michael boy and Natter-B.

After we'd go to movies, she never ceased to amaze me when she'd start quoting all the funny lines as we'd walked out of the theater. She was a funny girl. Her favorite quotes came from The Three Amigos and episodes of Brach. And of course I can’t let this paragraph end without mentioning the scene she used to act out from Star Wars that never ceased to make me laugh. "Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, You're My Only Hope." We spent an enjoyable afternoon once with her dressed up as Princess Leia, dishtowel draped around her for a skirt, hair wrapped up in buns, and trash can on her (which I can’t possibly remember what she did with).

She was often like that, dressing up in character before descending on us unannounced in full character as she quoted from her favorite movies. Oh she was a funny girl!

Annee was popular all throughout school, not because she was “rich” (we were poor) or was "cool", but because she genuinely cared about people and was a happy-fun person to be around. She stayed close to friends she had from elementary school on up through college because the relationships she formed were genuine and people knew it.

She fell in love and married a guy that was perfect for her in every way, even though he wasn't her "type". At first they were just acquaintances, but friendship grew to admiration, which in turn developed into a deep abiding love, and respect for the quiet gentle man who won her heart. Theirs was a happy marriage, one built on respect and love for each other, their disagreements were just that, disagreements. Arguments were tame and thoughtful.

Something she used to say about marriage was, "Start as you mean to go on." That you build patterns even in the beginning stages of a relationship, and that it's easier to uproot a pattern or path and re-lay it than to combat years of misunderstandings, bad patterns, and miscommunication.

Annee delighted in finding a steal on the bargain racks, and was crafty and artsy, but in an elegant and hip way.

She was smart. She earned fabulous grades in school (Summa Cum Laude in High School and Magna Cum Laude in college), received her Associates in 1 1/2 years, and her bachelor's in 1 1/2. Annee and I graduated with our bachelor's at the same time (despite a four year age gap). Two years later, she received a Master's in Social Work, and a couple days before graduation gave birth to her darling little girl Alli.

Two months later she was diagnosed with stage four liver cancer. No, she never drank alcohol. Yes, 90 year olds usually get this disease. She was 22.

She was always nice to me, and I knew that no matter how silly or stupid my problems were, she was there to listen. She genuinely cared, as was part of her charm.

She looked forward to being a mother, and absolutely loved her little girl Alli during the first two years of Alli’s life. Annee and her husband called Alli their little angel, because she was a sweet-tempered girl, which was a tremendous blessing as Annee struggled through bouts of chemo, pain, and sleepless nights.

She was a woman of faith, who was an example of patience as she fought to the end. She loved our Father in Heaven and would often turn to the scriptures and to Him in prayer seeking comfort and peace.

I know she still lives and watches down on us.

For those of you who knew Annee, what do you remember about her?

A Day of Good Deeds, 9/11

Six years ago when two planes crashed into the World Trade Center in NYC, and then into the Pentagon and a field in Pennsylvania, I was shocked.

I remember blow drying my hair upstairs when it happened. My mom had turned on the TV to watch the news and we found out what had been happening for the past forty-five minutes back East.

I remember sitting down at the top of the stairs, brush in hand, in disbelief. There I hovered, hoping and waiting for it to not be as bad as it looked. I don’t know why I stayed up there on those hard wooden steps looking through the banister to the TV screen below, when I could have gone down and sat comfortably on the couch, but there I stayed for the next couple of hours riveted to all that was happening.

I remember feeling sick inside, my face echoing the horror I saw etched on the faces shown as the towers began to fall. You see, I knew that surely everyone would make it out of the towers okay. That there would be a happy ending. And as rescuers dug through the rubble, I thought surely they would find survivors.

My sister, The Expat, told me once of that day in Washington DC. She worked in the International Trade Center in the District, and she told me stories of the evacuation. Of women running in their stockinged feet, leaving high heeled shoes behind. Of the confusion, and panic that she and her then fiancée experienced while trying to find each other in the crowds. And lastly of their long trek home, on foot, crossing over the Potomac.

But mostly what I remember from that day, beyond the horror and dismay, is the outpouring of service. Of the New Yorkers reaching out and giving aid to strangers they’d never met; the long lines of people waiting to donate blood for survivors that would never be found; the many acts of kindness to neighbors; volunteers and professionals rushing into the fray to save someone else.

It was beautiful to watch as kindness and gentleness spread across the nation as we all for a few short months were kinder to each other.

And that dear readers, is what I’d like you to remember today. Not the horror and anger. Yes, there is a place for the anger, but it doesn’t do much except eat at you from within. Instead, I urge you to reach out to others in need and do a good deed. To honor and remember those admirable and brave people that lost their lives on 9/11/01 in service.

Here's a quote from an article in Yahoo! news about an organization called myGoodDeed.org.

“The heroic acts of all those killed trying to save others that September morning has spawned a growing grass-roots movement. The goal is to ensure that future generations remember not just the horror of the attacks, but also the extraordinary outpouring of humanity during the days, weeks, and months that followed.”

I urge you to remember and honor those who died that day, by reaching out and doing a good deed.

To learn more about or participate in my Good Deed, click here.

-Bitter